I came with all my books, lived in dorms, followed directions.
I worked, I studied hard, met lots of folks who had connections.
I crammed, they gave me grades, and may I say not in a fair way.
But more, much more than this, I did it their way.
I learned all sorts of things, although I know I'll never use them.
The courses that I took were all required, I didn't choose them.
You'll find that to survive it's best to act the doctrinaire way.
And so I buckled down and did it their way.
Yes, there were times I wondered why
I had to crawl when I could fly.
I had my doubts, but after all,
I clipped my wings, and learned to crawl.
I had to bend, and in the end
I did it their way.
And so, my fine young friends, now that I'm a full professor
Where once I was oppressed, now I've become the cruel oppressor.
With me you'll learn to cope, you'll learn to climb life's golden stairway.
What can I do? What can I do?
Open your books. Read chapter two.
And if it seems a bit routine,
Don't come to me, go see the dean.
As long as they give me my pay
I'll do it their way.
Doctrinaire: Stubbornly devoted to some particular doctrine or theory without regard to practical considerations: dogmatic (Webster’s).